jus a short ranting on love n gf stuffs.

Went out wif 2 friends ytd.. n was sorta describing abt Y, mentuioning how she 's a good gf and all. And I really believed that. I feel sad that I'm losing such a good gf who was willing to sacrifice so much for me.. BUT... good as she is, don't mean she's ideal for me.

Here's an example. Say u managed to get a 2000 dollar saddle.. those riding horse sort. You don't really need it but it's a really really GOOD saddle. One day, someone loses it for you and you're sorta sore about it. But why? Well, I'm thinkin it's because you lost something really good.. not just because you lost something in general but it was something really REALLY good that you lost. But end of the day, did you really need it? Good as something seems, it might not be something for you. It'd have been better for someone with a horse at the very least.

(ok.. ok.. lousy example of a GOOD thing but u get the idea alright? This is not to say or iimply anything abt Y alright?)

so it's the same case as it is with Y. She's really been gfreat with regards to my dreams. Tho she might not always be agreeing with my wokr and what I do. She still supports me. Like gettin my equips as gifts for me... willing to go n travel overseas with me if need be just to be with me. Maybe I'm being too romantic in seein it this way but I'll like to think it this way tho you could see it as a form of circumstances or situational conveinience. But love me as she might, I know that it's not ideal for me. And if it ain't, then it's not fair for her either. And I don't want to be with her just out of obligation or sympathy. I want to go over and comfort her. Take care of her, shelter her. I have no problems doing this if need be but I think all that is only short termed.

Yeah.. think that's my take on things right now. I do feel responsible for the fallin out of things and man, did it happen fast, but think people recognise that it will be for the better and that really is my consolation. I really feel bad for the circumstances it happened under cos i think it could have been better. I'd hate for this to scar her cos really, she's a wonderful girl. And she did nothing wrong. Maybe she just needs to fidn someone who accepts her and is more giving than I could ever be. One can only hope right now.

Anyway. thanks to all who have been ther,e lent a shoulder or otherwise.. And thanks for puttin up with the whining, pining and whatever else I've been doing. Moody and all. I'll be fine in time to come. Take care all. See y'all soon.