I miss her. Well, I was missing her last night anyway. Not sure why either. I'm not sure if it's the familiarity that I miss.

I was thinkin of all the options n choices in my head. A part of me thinks that there are probably so many other women out there and I don't need to be stuck with her. BUt yet, one part of me just can't be bothered to do the chasing man. It's darn tiring. (maybe tt's why women are complaining that the men aren't romantic and all that) I'm thinkin it's the pride men have, that after some time of being the fool, they want to have at least some pride to hold on to to make up for the past times where they were so easily played for. Or even the times of rejection.

But yeah, i was thinkin that I could just find someone who didn't have the same issues and problems that Y had. These thoughts aren't new to me. Then I realised this was the commonality which me and Y had which probably is what kept us both together. One could actually see it as laziness or the desire not to want to take risk.

We both don't wish to start anew with another person. I'm not sure if I played a part in convincing her of that but that's what I'm thinking anyway. There's no way in telling if the next person would be better or worst than your current. Not knowing. So why not work with what you know and try to make the time you spent with your current partner better? Rather than breakin and spending all that energy chasing a potential someone which you ain't even sure how tt would work out.

Then again, maybe we both haven't met tt someone who would give us enough push to end the relationship. And that the people that entered our lives are too much of a risk n uncertainty.

I'm not really sure of things right now. Current feeling is that I want her back. But somehow, not with the negativities attached. I think it has come to a stage that I just am not tolerant of the stunts anymore. And I feel that I really need to do something about it.

but yet, I cna't help but think back about a particular quote.

"Sometimes, doing everything can be worst than doing nothing".

Is it such a case?

Anyway, I dunn. Funny, people always want the last say. And in some way, I THINK I got it but now, what am I supposed to do. This whole thing is so darn new to me. And I dun think I wanna get the hang of it either.

Problems problems problems.

Anyway, I think i got better things to do. I'm tied up with work for Friday and half of saturday. And in lieu of that, I need to clear hdd space man.. Them pics are taking quite a bit of space man. :S

Laterz.. hope I dun have anymore to rant about. I'm gettin tired of all this but it beats callin up someone to do so. So yar.. sorry for all this.