It's been sucha up n down thing. Sometimes, we're up, sometimes we're down. But yet, the ups are so enjoyable but yet the downs feel puzzlin so darn off that I wonder why we stay and remain together. I guess it's something ineveitable but the question is when do the downs offset the ups. I think that sometimes, the bad bits are always there but it just takes something to make things a bit more irritable than normal. And it's easy to see that sometimes, the problems are not new but yet, it's not easy to reset to the times of before when one felt more tolerating of the problem. COuld one say that one has had enough?

I find myself less tolerating of things. I'm not sure why. Mayb i do but I just don't know it yet. Mayb this is just a phrase. Or is it a self fulfillin prophecy that I'm commiting. But the thot the it wouldn't work out is never far from my head or least, it's there but dormant so what makes things different now? Twice we fell asleep not being very normal but into the night, just went back to normal. And whenever I fall asleep, I ask why things are so but when the next morning arrives, things don't seem that bad. It's all a different phrase constantly.

Last night she was aggitated and irritated. 'Pek Chek' as she puts it but she doesn't know at what. Then she mentions something about this other guy which suddenly popped to her head which ain't related to anythign. Guy was from sec school and she hated tt guy anyway cos he dunno how many timed her. of cos, those were the younger days. Then she lamented about hating herself. Then the gears in my head starting turnin again. Anyway, she wanted to drink again. Dunno why people like to 'he men jio'. Guiltily, I let her have it cos I was sorta hopin she would yack wadeva she wa thinkin no matter how incoherent it might be. Think I was lookin for trouble somehow. But anyway, after one drink, didn't wan liao. Said it sucked. Dammit. I had to finish the rest. KNS. Anyway, i dozed soon after. I was darn tired. And later, went back to normal when we woke up. Supposed to wake up at 3 to send her home but we both kept pushin back the time, changing the alarmn timin all the way to 6. Funny.

Then now, i'm lamentin about somethign that might not be anything. Hmm... Wassup man.